All Cheerleaders Die
Film Review by Kam Williams
It’s H.S. Jocks vs. Cute Coeds in Remake of Revenge Horror Comedy
In 2001, Lucky McKee co-wrote and co-directed All Cheerleaders Die, a horror comedy shot on a shoestring budget about some cute high school coeds-turned-soulless cannibals who rise from the dead to exact revenge on their boyfriends. Apparently not satisfied with that initial effort, the same filmmaking team decided to collaborate on a remake of their own picture a dozen years later.
Since this critic never saw the original, I can’t honestly say whether the new version represents a substantial improvement over the source material. FYI, this edition is basically a campy B-flick marked by the same shopworn clichés, cheesy dialogue and low production values it presumes to lampoon.
The story is set at Blackfoot High School where, at the point of departure, we find attractive, mean girl Alexis (Felisha Cooper) talking trash during cheerleading practice. But she dies on the spot, after being accidentally dropped on her head while executing a difficult stunt.
Instead of mourning, her boyfriend Terry (Tom Williamson), the captain of the football team, soon starts dating Tracy (Brooke Butler), another cheerleader. This horrifies rebel lesbian classmate Maddy (Caitlin Stasey) who auditions for Alexis’ spot on the squad in order to get even with Terry by stealing the affections of Tracy.
He reacts by forbidding his pals from dating cheerleaders, asking, “Do you want to waste your senior year chasing a Jesus freak who’s never going to put out when there’s a whole world of [p-word] out there?” Instead, he directs the guys go after Goths, nerds, drama chicks, stoners, fat [b-words] and freshmen.
Next, fate intervenes in the way of a crash that takes the lives of a carful of cheerleaders. Somehow, Maddy and company subsequently morph into man-eating zombies that love to feast on macho football players. And the ghoulish girls get the better of their former beaus it in the ensuing, supernatural splatterfest.
A gruesome, expletive-laced, battle-of-the-sexes satire of the scary movie genre featuring enough eroticized gore and titillation at every turn to hold the attention of the testosterone-fueled demographic for the duration.
Good (2 stars)
Running time: 90 minutes
Distributor: RLJ/Image Entertainment
To see a trailer for All Cheerleaders Die, visit: https://www.youtube.com/watch?